years, when the world collectively thought we were all either mentally disabled or bent on world destruction. This was an especially important trait for an American traveling during the George W. Whether it’s for selfish gain, helping the reputation of Americans traveling abroad, or simply the spreading of good vibes, you will make nice even when faced with cultural frustrations and repeated smug “not possible”s. You behave yourself when dealing with local hotel clerks/train operators/tour guides etc. Basically, just be aware to show the culturally correct amount of booty. You do hike your bathing suit up your booty on the beach in Brazil. You don’t wear booty shorts to the Western Wall on Shabbat. You are aware of cultural differences, and go out of your way to blend. If you’re looking for them, don’t go posh. P.S.: Attractive single people almost exclusively stay at dumps. Conversely, if your travel companions can’t afford what you can afford, you are willing to slum it in the name of camaraderie.
If you can’t afford the trip, you don’t go. You know what the trip is going to cost, and can afford it. How to read a map, how to order when you can’t read the menu, how to find a bathroom, or a train, or a castle. If you find that you want to do things differently than your companions, you happily tell them to go on without you in a way that does not sound like you’re saying, “This is a test.” 5. You are aware of your travel companions, and of not being contrary to their desires/needs/schedules more often than necessary. You don’t change rooms three times, you’ll take an overnight bus if you must, you can go without meat in India and without vegan soy gluten-free tempeh butter in Bolivia, and you can shut the hell up about it. You are easygoing about sleeping/eating/comfort issues. You venture to the places where the tourists aren’t, in addition to hitting the “must-sees.” If you are exclusively visiting places where busloads of Chinese are following a woman with a flag and a bullhorn, you’re not doing it.
Which, in my opinion, is the mark of a great trip. (How else are you going to get the volcano dust off?) You say yes because it is the only way to really experience another place, and let it change you. You say yes to whatever comes your way, whether it’s shots of a putrid-smelling yak-butter tea or an offer for an Albanian toe-licking. So, in short, my list of what makes a good traveler, which I recommend you use when interviewing your next potential trip partner: 1. And if there is one philanthropic deed that can come from this book, maybe it will be that I teach a few more people how to do it right. There is the right way to travel, and the wrong way. “I probably should say that this is what makes you a good traveler in my opinion, but deep down I really think this is just universal, incontrovertible truth.
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